How can a Mentor help a family?

The Skills that A Family Mentor Needs 

Without volunteer mentors, most Family Mentoring schemes could not function, and both families and children wouldn't get the support they need. 

A family Mentor is a friend, an encourager, and a listening ear. A family mentor is trained to work with a family helping them to achieve the changes they want to make in their lives - and can assist with:-

family relationships
parenting
budgeting
finding a job
managing health issues
life goals
links to services
connecting with the community

What skills do family Mentors need?

an experience of life
an ability to work as part of a team
an understanding of the pressures facing parents today
and a genuine interest in supporting families in the community

Being a volunteer can be hard work, but it is also rewarding, giving many chances for personal development and the chance to give something back to your local community. Commitment for a long term relationship is required - weekly visits to your family for sometimes up to a year or more.

Working as a family Mentor makes you feel valued and allows you to discover skills you didn't know you had and meet a whole range of people that you would otherwise not meet. It can provide you with a whole experience and richness that you wouldn't get otherwise.

Most volunteer mentors receive some basic training. This could include areas like:-

The Coaching Relationship
Building a Trusting Relationship
Relating & Engaging
Goal Setting & Empowerment
Values, Confidentiality & Boundaries
Basic Communication Skills
Working with Children
Family Conflict
Depression & Mental Health

There is normally ongoing support and supervision from the organisation you are working with.

Keys to Understanding Your Child

Parents are often amazed at the different personalities of their children. The most important role parents have is to celebrate their child's uniqueness and become effective in nurturing them so that they are able to realise their full potential. A child's character will change as they grow, but their personality traits will stay with them.

Parents can see their children developing. What are their consistent traits? What do they like doing? Are they adjusting to the changes going on around them? Observe your child as they eat, sleep and play, and be aware of the subtle ways in which they are unique.

Communicating with your child is the key to understanding. Young children communicate through facial expressions and body language, and parents can respond in like manner. When a child is two or three years old they are able to understand when you talk to them. At three and four years old, they are still developing language skills, and are also able to let you know how they feel. It is important at this stage that you ask children questions that help them explore their inner feelings and the world around them. It is amazing how children can express themselves, often making up a new word to get their message acrosss.

Allow children to express their feelings by asking open ended questions. This will allow them to share their feelings to you. Ask what they liked best about school today, or, describe what they painted, or, how did they feel when they read their book right through for the first time.

When your child is young, they will have only a few influences around them. Parent will be the main influence, there may also be siblings at home. Grandparents also provide a significant influence. But when a child starts school, there are other influences. The child's teacher will make a big impact on their lives. They will also make new friends. Sometimes you will see a change in behaviour as they adjust to their new world.

If your child starts to show aggressive behaviour in class or with other children, look around for possible explanations. It could be the new environment, or maybe that they are responding to another child's aggressive behaviour in like manner. If the problem is in their environment, you will be there to guide them through and be their anchor. Are there any tensions at home? Remember that your own actions as a parent leave a deep impression on your child. As a parent be aware of how your child sees the world around them.

Every new parent wonders how they will manage. Is there already experience around you? Your own parents may be there to offer practical support when you need it. Friends who may have slightly older children can reassure you when things seem to be going wrong. You can also learn by reading books and checking all that information online. You could attend a class on how to be a better parent. A family mentor can help you to use your strengths to help draw out the potential in your children.

Parenting seems to be getting more difficult. There are many pressures in today's world. There are careers to pursue and challenges to face. But being a parent has the greatest potential to experience pleasure and fulfillment. Being a good parent requires dedication and being prepared to spend quality time with your children. Understanding your child is the key to successful parenting.

Family Mentoring

Family mentoring is becoming  more relevant to many families. But how can a family mentor help?.

Families seem to be under increasing pressure. During the past 30 years families have been under the microscope both politically and culturally. Are parenting standards really declining? Is poor parenting responsible for the lack of a sense of community? There seems to be a lack of conclusive evidence to support any particular theory. There is no easy solution as these are complex problems.

Families are becoming increasingly isolated, both geographically, as extended families move away, and emotionally, as families experience break up. Families are a building block for our communities and our nations, so any dysfunction in this area often leads to social and economic instability.

Families are changing shape. Many families now have a single parent, generally the mother. There are an increasing number of step families. Some children are now looking after a disabled mother or father. This blurring of the boundaries makes it difficult to define a family.

Families are suffering from social exclusion through debt, long term unemployment, disablity, lack of parenting and social skills. These are problems that a family mentor can help with.

Family mentoring can help transform the lives of families who are suffering from the impact of social exclusion. This will empower families to achieve their full potential by creating opportunities and strengthening community ties. A family mentor can encourage community participation by helping families access further support services within their communities. A family mentor can give families hope.